Self Help? Help Yourself!

I feel that any online help  to an older person with social anxiety is minimal to say the least. I looked earlier at a Social anxiety facebook group and one of the posts was post a picture of yourself and guess what age I am. I barely saw anyone at all over the age of 25. Likewise on the main social anxiety website in the entire UK and they have a section for the over 30’s as if you are on the verge of death once you hit 30. Online is the only place in the world it seems where you are getting on a bit once you pass 29. Yet there have been many posts quite surprisingly on the forum in the last year from people still suffering from anxiety at 40 years of age and over. However they rarely ever post. I dont either. I only average 0.8 post per day in using the UK social anxiety forum for over 8 years. I look every day and can’t find one f**king thing to reply to most days. Its like trying to break into a secret society and is about as cliquey as it gets with a small group of regular members who talk to each other and pretty much ignore anyone else.

Its bad enough to feel alone and totally left out in real life but its just the same online. I did find one very good friend from using the forum and even meet her several times per year but in all other purposes using the uk forum and other self help forums has been ABSOLUTELY FUCKING USELESS to my mental health.  In fact it often makes me feel worse and even more lonely. If I dont get ignored as per usual I have often got into online arguments on virtually any subject as you have to be so left wing as to almost be insane in order to be accepted by them. Yes, they’re so tolerant as long as you think exactly the same as them.  When I have tried to be empathetic or make contact with someone they almost always blank me as if I am not worthy enough so it just increases my paranoia. If you dont want to make contact with people or make friends then what the F**K are they doing on a support forum? Oh you only want to make contact with certain types of people do you? Fuckable ones you mean? The regulars speak almost obsessively about going to local meets as an almost cure all for anxiety and totally ignore the fact that someone well past 40 in in not any way going to enjoy socialising or make friends with shy awkward twenty somethings with nothing in common whatsoever and vice versa. A girl even said she felt too old for a meet at 30 a couple of weeks ago so how the hell do they think it makes me feel at past 40?

If anything using such forums has made me even more depressed, hopeless and believing in evolution and survival of the fittest. If you aren’t attractive or normal in the first place no one wants to know you.People are all judgemental and all selfish. Yes I know I am too, that’s the point, its a human characteristic.


Author: klodo

I am male,English and have had social anxiety since I started school at 5 years of age. I like photography, walking, wildlife, history and moaning.........CONSTANTLY! Oh you must stop being so negative! Shut up! NOW WITH ADDED DEPRESSION!

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