My moods can go downhill so fast it’s like being hit with a hammer. I had felt better and more positive in the last two weeks even though I have spoken to no one and done nothing interesting in this time. I had tried to be at least more positive online and had replied to a couple of people. On Friday I began to feel much worse. Last night I had some quite depressing dreams and woke thinking someone was poking me in the arm but it was in fact a nervous twitch on the inside of my right elbow. When I have been highly stressed before I had gotten twitches on my eyelid and above my knee. It seems even if I try to suppress my feelings of dread and fear during the day they are unleashed during my sleep and so there is no escape. Today even shopping became hard again and my anxiety increased to such extent that I was edgy and unable to do anything without endlessly watching the clock again. I can’t even imagine posting online as I dont know if people are being sarcastic bastards or that I am just paranoid. Its as if someone just pushes a button and I go mad again. My insanity is now way more than just shyness even if that was the start.