Fitting In

Does your anxiety make you feel like a bad person, like you deserve to be alone or suffer. I think it’s quite common for shy people to not fit in at school and work and become isolated. However as I have mentioned many times before, humans as in totally normal humans rather than evil ones can still be very judgemental and cruel. So you have kids bullying others and ostracising them for the most trivial of reasons. This can make us feel bitter and resentful. We have done nothing wrong and yet people appear to avoid and dislike us like we are evil or done something wrong. This makes joining in on those rare good days much harder. if we feel that others already have bad feelings towards us then it is that much harder to make an effort as we are much more likely to be rejected.

This means it’s not simply our paranoia and negative thinking affecting us but a quite legitimate response to the way we have been treated in the past for simply being quiet. I distinctly remember the people who avoided me and who said things about me at work. The nasty looks and sneering at me as if I was not worthy to even speak to them even when I did try. One girl who particularly disliked me is now on facebook and is married to a guy who is totally bald and pig ugly but of course he is not shy so probably has a good job and is full of witty banter so outranks me on any evolutionary scale.

Even now after a break of two weeks I can’t bring myself to post on the main Uk anxiety forum as I never feel like I am one of them or fit in. Paranoia? I have had so many posts ignored I might as well change my username to C**T. One regular poster who seems popular although I am not sure why boasted of how they ignore any posts from certain other posters. Really? They openly ignore people on a forum for people with social anxiety and boast about it?  So of course using the internet to cure, maybe not cure but ease your anxiety can actually make you feel just as disliked and alone as real in life without ever doing anything wrong.

Advertisements

Author: klodo

I am male,English and have had social anxiety since I started school at 5 years of age. I like photography, walking, wildlife, history and moaning.........CONSTANTLY! Oh you must stop being so negative! Shut up!

1 thought on “Fitting In”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s