True Colors

Show me a smile then,
Don’t be unhappy, can’t remember
When I last saw you laughing

 

Finding it very hard not to get very down and depressed again. I may force myself to go for a walk but it’s wet and drizzly out and it’s almost as bad as staying inside. I know my mood has nose dived sharply again over the last week and using the anxiety forum is getting hard as I feel disliked, ignored and very paranoid. Of course you could say that using the anxiety forum is the very reason I get paranoid and depressed and its just like in real life where people dislike and ignore you. Is this really irrational thinking or the blunt truth? I am still not sure. Its clearly obvious that people on such forums who think of themselves as friendly and non judgmental are in reality no such thing and they are only friendly to certain people who they regard as good enough to get their attention.  Still that’s loneliness and desperation for you. Since I talk to no people in real life for weeks at a time I am forced to go online. It doesn’t matter though. People are people whether online or in reality and it’s just as hard to connect. Just be yourself my arse. Once you have  a bad reputation everything you say or do is ignored.

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Author: klodo

I am male,English and have had social anxiety since I started school at 5 years of age. I like photography, walking, wildlife, history and moaning.........CONSTANTLY! Oh you must stop being so negative! Shut up!

2 thoughts on “True Colors”

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