Its been another bad week. Insomnia, and lack of sleep led to me buying sleeping tablets online. They dont even sell them on Amazon UK any more so they are probably bad for you or banned but desperate people resort to anything. The shit advice for insomnia is meaningless. Relaxation techniques dont work when you have outside circumstances which are unremitting like other people and noise.The only thing that could get me to sleep better would be living in another house which would mean winning the lottery.
The resulting increased anxiety has resulted in regular heart pain. It seems to be connected to getting stressed and lasts for many hours afterwards, almost as I have pulled a muscle. Then when having a shower on Tuesday I noticed a lump up my backside. Its still there and pains me to sit down. I should see a doctor shouldn’t I? Well I phoned up yesterday and despite living in the same house where I was born over 4o years ago they have taken me off their list of patients(without contacting me of course) and now I have to try and register again which of course delays any appointment to see my lump meaning it may get worse. Oh the wonderful NHS. if I do get accepted then I have to go for a new patient check up in three weeks. Perhaps I’ll tell him/her about my life long social anxiety and see if they have even heard of it. They probably tell me its all in my head and I should just get out more!