I had a much better day yesterday even after taking a sleeping tablet again. I went for a walk in the local woodland and country park as it was sunny and just being out all day seemed to help. Thankfully the sleeping tablet does not seem to have an affect upon exercise and I felt better the longer I was out. I even had a young couple ask me about walks and places to go in the area and I managed to speak to them for a while although still felt self conscious(yes, even at my age!) Mind you it was my first conversation in 10 days with real humans!
Exercise and keeping busy are really good for stopping depressive thoughts although its too tiring to do every day and there are simply not enough places to go for variety. For the last 8 years I had gone to the passion play about the crucifixion in the city centre every Good Friday but due to cuts they can no longer afford to do it and they now just sing a few hymns and have a gospel choir. I didn’t like it last year so I didn’t go back again.
Today I forced myself to go to the cathedral where there was a service for the 1st anniversary of the re-internment of Richard III who they found under the car park. I try to get out every day if I can. It helps a little.