So I visited the doctors this morning for my new patients check up despite not being a new patient. More accurately as I had not been in 18 years they de-registered me, threw away my previous records without telling me and made me re-register as a new patient. As expected it was a complete waste of time. I did not even get to see a doctor, it was a youngish nurse who asked me the standard how much do you drink, smoke, exercise questions in a rather robotic manner as if she was just going through the motions. I did briefly mention my anxiety and heart pain but she just said I would have to make another appointment to see the doctor and dismissed it. I lied of course about how much alcohol I was drinking. 14 units a week, more like 25-40. To embarrass me further she even asked how long I had been unemployed and I lied about that too. She might as well have asked me how long my penis was and if I was a virgin. I was glad to get out of there.
My blood pressure was a bit too high. Well I have been getting into fits of aggression, talking to myself all day and having chronic insomnia for months, if not years and I dont speak to anyone for weeks and think about suicide often but nobody want to know about mental health do they? She also took some blood. I wonder if it shows I’m a borderline alcoholic and any signs of those sleeping tablets I got off amazon. She did not even tell me if I have to contact them for the results or they contact me but judging by past experiences that will probably be the last contact I have with them for years. I got so agitated when I got home I even started hitting myself in the head again. Great start to the week.