Under Pressure

glass-half-full

Obviously people dont like negativity or negative people. You bore and depress others and bring them down.(Just like this blog!) Evolution at work again, we evolved to avoid losers unless we already know them and care about them and then we want to help. Therefore there is great pressure in society to appear happy and positive and interesting even if you are suffering major mental problems and are as depressed as f**K. For instance, the question “Hi, how are you, how was your weekend?” is never really intended to be answered truthfully for mad people. The normals expect you to say “Ok, not too bad thanks.” even if it was a terrible weekend. We are even told off for being negative even if that’s how we feel.

Therefore you isolate yourself because of other people and their lack of understanding and even hostility towards you.You even start to think of all people as the enemy and can never imagine anyone being nice to you again. This even happens on anxiety forums where unless you have already formed a social network(by being positive and probably humorous) most of your posts are ignored. So you become more and more isolated and get even worse. Yet the advice almost everywhere is to go out there and do anything as if its a certain cure. But of course when you do you still come across as negative and depressing and with anxiety you may also be socially inept and so also appear rude and the whole thing starts again. Its a disaster so you give in.

There is absolutely no emphasis on how you have to appear friendly, enthusiastic and good company to start with to make a good impression. Bit hard to do if you are feeling suicidal dont you think? Just doing anything does not work if you just stand around looking at the floor and looking miserable. We are regularly told how most people judge others in the first few minutes and then also that nobody cares about our strange behaviour or even notices when its obvious that they do and shy people often give a terrible first impression.  All evidences suggest to me that therapists and self help experts really dont have any idea or are deliberately lying. Depression and chronic anxiety together and with no support network can send you into a downward spiral where all hope begins to vanish. I am still trying to find anything online which does indeed offer any hope other than just force yourself to go out and talk to strangers.

 

 

 

 

 

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