Its hardly a coincidence that many people with stable lives and positive mindsets had stable and good upbringings and that so many people who are screwed up had bad upbringings. A good proportion of our prison systems and homeless populations have mentally ill people in them. So how much of what we have become and our lives is a choice and within our own grasp and how much is beyond our control? We like to believe that it all is as that gives us control. I am not so sure any-more. My grandmother had problems and so did my mother and most of my uncles and aunties on that side of the family. My own brother and sister have anxiety and so do some of our cousins.
Some people will say that this is just an excuse to pass the blame and evade personal responsibility. However my anxiety, depression and negativity is a mirror image of my mothers so this was all passed on through either genetics or learned behaviour probably both. A fear of impending doom and thinking the worst has been there since childhood and has never left. Having a happy stable upbringing would have almost certainly resulted in a different personality and greater chance of success and contentment.
So you are put here with these problems and if you cant solve them and become successful yourself then you are blamed as if its entirely your own fault when most people who succeed never had to go though them in the first place. Of course I am the only one who can now do anything about this but I did not know about SA until I was in my thirties,most things did not work and there is not much help available on the NHS anyway so people demanding you get help and that will definitely cure you are completely deluded.
Even going to the supermarket makes me feel jumpy now. Today the cashier actually said something and laughed. I had no idea what she was on about and no witty banter appeared in my head so I just so Oh and tried to smile. I probably looked a twat. You see just demanding you say witty banter at strangers does snot work if you are a feeling bad, that is why so much advice for social anxiety is absolute shit and does not work as if you are a nervous and on edge to begin with then all normal conversation goes out of the window even if someone speaks to me first. Forcing yourself to speak and when nervous or anxious nearly always results in failure and greater anxiety.